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Tuesday, September 03, 2002
      ( 11:13 AM ) Jackie  

I Have Risen

The strangest thing is that my hands are very dry. The blisters on three fingers of my right hand have turned flaky and I have little wrinkles all up and down my fingers. Perhaps the rest of me is dry as well and it's probably from sweating out a fever.

Last night around midnight for no particular reason and after being sick in bed for 2 days I felt un-sick. It was as if someone flipped a switch. I was sick. Flip! I was un-sick. I tidied up the kitchen while the hot tub heated, soaked for a while and went back to bed. While I slept someone flipped the switch again so when I woke up I was sick. Worse than before. Just before I dropped off to sleep once again I thought I should go to the emergency room. Someone was beating on my head from the inside and my throat and lungs were on fire. I took some kind of pills for colds and went under.

Now the switch seems stuck, with sickness and wellness flickering back and forth. I've had a shower and pulled the sheets off my bed. These are enormous accomplishments. Water for tea is almost at the boil. I feel a little sick to my stomach but otherwise all right, though I'm not quite inhabiting my body yet. Or my mind. Yet.

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Words and photos from Jackie in Oakland, CA. More I cannot tell you ... I won't know what it is until I do it.

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